Roasted nuts, breasts, and Cancun..

Everything started out normally at 5:45 when I woke up to the sound of my alarm clock bidding me good morning and announcing that it was the start of my travel day. I can’t say that it went downhill from there but I should have known something unexpected was going to happen.

I got myself ready and walked out to the beach. The camping family wasn’t up yet and I had bus information for the next part of their trip. They were all safe and sound in their camping hammocks under the sea grape trees. Their plans are pretty fluid and included stops in Placencia and Punta Gorda (PG), both south of Hopkins and Kismet. They would be up soon enough, packing, and I’d pass my info to them. We did have plans to walk to the 7am Hopkins bus stop, just 3 lanes down from Kismet. They aren’t more than a footnote here though.

Tricia had the kitchen open so I went up to see what was going on. The table was set for breakfast and the pot of coffee was sitting on the table. She regally swept in and we exchanged morning pleasantries As always she was a whirling dervish of energy, cleaning, moving things, etc. In seconds she had the coffee pot turned on it’s side, draining into one of the empty breakfast plates. Back on it base in seconds and the area cleaned in seconds.

Robert moseyed in, yep he’s a mossier, Matt next, and then Conan, who’s been acting rather oddly lately, was almost right behind him. The past couple of days has seem Conan waking up much earlier than he has almost since he arrive in late November. It could be that he wants his baby back into the water and underway, it may be something else. No matter. He did say he was going to be up to see me off, and he was. Again, pleasantries all around. Out of the corner of my eye I saw one of the camper girls walking toward the kitchen steps so I met her half way. Her sister came from the direction of the shower too so I told them the info on the bus and about going to Placencia by boat from Independence, the town on the way to PG. I also asked if they were feeling better after having spent the previous day trying for news of family and friends back in tornado revenged Joplin, MO. (Thankfully they learned everyone was fine.) and they said a good night’s sleep is what they needed and got. So, off to my final packing. Six-thirty came and I said my goodbyes to goodbyes to everyone, got plenty of hugs, and headed for the parking lot to start walking to the bus stop. Robert offered us a ride and we were saved from a much longer walk because of it. He got us to the stop just as the bus was backing out into the street. If we’d have walked we’d have missed it and had to walk the much longer distance to the middle of the village. I mentioned that it was hot already at 7am so we would have been sweat drenched by the time we got there, having dragged all of out luggage. The ride through Hopkins and out to the 2 junctions was normal. The campers got off at the Hopkins Road junction and we waved a final goodbye. I got off at the Southern Hwy and Hummingbird Highways for my trip west and north. The bus came. I got on, and that was the start of my adventure.

I boarded the chicken bus to Belize City and it was standing room only. The buses used for intra-Belize travel are Bluebird school buses. They hold about 50 kids and haven’t been modified for larger adults so foot and knee space is at a premium. There were probably 20 people standing in the aisle. Since I was the last on from the 6 Mile junction I chose to stay right near the door. The buses are not air conditioned and at 8am it was already near 90. The windows and front entry door are always left open to allow for the 55mph airflow to make the heat more tolerable. I chose to sit on the plastic engine cover right next to the driver and toll taker, who stands in the door. At least I had a seat of sorts. Now here’s where things get interesting! The plastic engine cover was pretty slippery so I was holding onto anything I could hook my fingers on. And to make matters worse it got hot. After about 45 minutes my butt and boy parts had been slow roasted. I started formulating a plan to boycott Planters Peanut because now I know what happens when they slow roast their nuts. I don’t ever want to hear of a nut having to be put through that because it burns (if you get my drift)! But I endured it and was pleasantly rewarded for my tribulation. After passing through the Mayan Mountains the driver came up on a stalled truck rather suddenly and had to slam on the brakes. I was rewarded, although it was a rescue attempt, by a dark haired American girl who was thrown forward onto me, and I grabbed her to keep her from slamming into the windshield, straddling my thighs with her hers, which landed her left breast right smack into my face. Well actually both of them were there but I had a better feel for the left one at first. Her continued slid actually dragged both of them across my face until she finally came to rest. I was a bit surprised but being a guy…I was in heaven. I haven’t been that friendly with a woman in some time! It took her a bit to get herself half way off of me and she started apologizing. I certainly didn’t need an apology, and barely heard it anyway because I was staring at a very nice set of…well, you know what! And I certainly needed/wanted more of what just happened. I told her not to worry about it, that it was the best thing that’s happened to me in a very long time. She chuckled and then…her headlights came on! She noticed it right away and man did she turn red! That did it for me! I was way past heaven now and she was still straddling me. She finally was able to stand up but gave me a kiss on the lips and a thank you for keeping her from getting hurt. The God’s are kind to the Fatboy every once in a while… At that point I found out that the conductor, who was standing in the open door, was slammed forward into the door and ejected out of the bus. Lucky for him the ground he landed on was soft and all he got was a few scrapes and bruises. Me, I got face breasted so I was the lucky of us. Anyway, her name is Callie and she is from NJ and was headed for San Ignacio for a week. We talked for the rest of the ride and she apologized again and I said that I was happy for “the way she ended up”. More laughs. The bus makes a stop in Belmopan and because it’s against the law for the bus to have passengers standing they stopped 2 blocks short of the terminal and asked everyone who was getting out in Belmopan to get off and walk in. Luckily no one was burdened with a lot of luggage. The bus pulled in, added more passengers, then headed for Belize City.

I got out at the Belize City bus stop and into a cab for the Caye Caulker Water Taxi where I was going to buy my ADO (Mexican) bus ticket to Cancun. Now I’d seen on their website that the bus left from there but that was old info. Now you take the chicken bus to Chetumal MX and get on the 1st class bus from there. So I buys me ticket and gets back into the cab. I told the driver what happened and he offered to drive me across the border into Mexico for $75 Belize ($37.50 US) and said he’d make it in under 2 hours. SOLD!!! Off we went. After that the trip turned normal. We crossed the border. I had absolutely no trouble with either crossing. I got on a local shuttle for at the border that took me to the ADO terminal for 10 Pesos (about 90 cents). Thirty minutes later I was on the air conditioned 1st class bus and headed north. With the 1 hour time advance in MX we arrived at around 9pm in downtown Cancun. The only bad thing about that ride was that I left my computer mouse in the seat and the bus pulled right out and headed somewhere else. (I’m using a mouse the hotel clerk lent me.) I told a taxi driver I wanted a cheap but nice hotel near the airport so I am safely in bed in a really nice Comfort Inn (with full breakfast and free airport shuttle) for US$60. I asked the desk clerk about something to eat and she pointed me toward the 7-11 and a Burger King because everything else was closed. I made the Burger King by 5 minutes. Any later and I’d have been dining on chips or something.

So that’s the 1st part of my travel tale. Hopefully the rest of my trip will be quiet. By the way, Matt and Angie left today too and are probably safely home in Chattanooga TN by now. They were flying out of Dangriga to Belize International and then Delta to Atlanta and Chattanooga. They had a great time while they were at Kismet and promised to come back again.

Good news...and bad news...

The good news:

Matt and Angie came back to us on Friday 5/6. They were here last November and enjoyed it so much they just had to return as soon as possible. (And we love that!) This time they brought their eldest daughter Shanee, a pretty little blonde to try the place out as well. She was an immediate hit with me because almost the 1st words out of her mouth were that she wanted to go fishing. A girl after my own heart! We didn’t make the nightly lagoon run but the next morning around 9am Matt, Shanee, and I grabbed fishing poles and Angie came along to sightsee. We didn’t catch anything but it was a nice way to start off their trip. Shanee, well Matt too, is excited about getting out to the reef for the big ones and we’ll do that as soon as Conan and I get the boat ship shape. On the way back to Kismet Shanee looked out over the sea and said she was impressed by the number of people out in the water and how far out they were. I guess she must need glasses because it was 2 large flocks of pelicans sitting in the water waiting for their breakfast to swim by. We had a good laugh over it. They did the zipline excursion yesterday and loved it. Matt taught repelling in the Army so he’s cool with it but Shanee was scares stiff. But she jumped off on each of the 6 different zipline and ended up loving the whole thing. Angie loved it too. They couldn’t stop talking about how much they enjoyed it. A couple of us here keep threatening to do that and the cave tubing too but for some reason we never get around to it. One day… Shanee left us today to return to her hubby and 3 year old daughter but she swears she’ll return. Matt and Angie would like to get the entire family down to enjoy Belize because they are hoping to retire here in 5 years or so.

I was like a kid in a candy store the 1st 2 days Matt and Angie arrived. I’d asked Matt to head to the store and resupply me with weights, swivel snaps, and wire leaders because I was about out. He did better than that, adding in some hooks and a couple lures too. I’m fully resupplied now. Another request I had was for a bottle of Bailey’s Irish Cream for my coffee and a bottle if Irish sipping whiskey. I got those the next day! He brought a bottle of Jameson, one of my very favorites. I shared shots with Conan and Chris (more on him later) in the kitchen and brought the bottle over to the Driftwood to share a bit with my Irish friend Oliver. He was in heaven too because you can’t get Irish whiskey here in Belize and I’m always teasing him about his joint being a pretty bad Irish pub because I can’t get any there. Bad me I wasn’t able to share a shot or 2 with Matt (it’s one of his favorites whiskeys too) and Angie until Monday night because they are always on the run. He wouldn’t take money for any of it but I’ll make up for it in other ways. It’s also just nice to see the 2 of them again. He and I still hold the total fish caught on a reef trip and I’m hoping we can better our total and keep he and I number 1.

Chris came back through Kismet on his way back to the sates and his job, on Saturday 5/7. It was a grand surprise because we didn’t know when to expect him. Conan and I were sitting in the kitchen yakking when he walked up and yelled to us. He’d grown his hair out and shaved (said it was for the ladies he met on his C.A. travels) so it took a second to realize who he was. So he got quickly back into the swing of Kismet life. Sad part is he only stayed until Wednesday 5/11 when he had to head to Belize City for his flight. Hopefully he’ll return next year!

Tuesday May 10th was our 1st reef diving/snorkeling/fishing trip out to the keys. Matt, Angie, Shanee, Conan, and I were the crew. They all snorkeled and I fished. I didn’t catch anything and I won’t tell you about the big cuda I lost after it jumped twice (ok I guess I just did) but Dwayne’s (owner of Bread&Butter Caye) 2 workman caught a nice cuda and a small jack. My compatriots had a great time with Conan and Dwayne’s Hawaiian sling spearing fish. We were given the 2 fish, actually we were given a much bigger cuda for taking them out and I gifted them each a lure, so we ate well that night and even fed 5 other guests. So, all in all, it was a great day!

And now the bad news:

Well it happened again! I was showing a flick up in the kitchen on Mother’s Day and while we were fully committed to watching “Paul” (which was pretty funny by the way) someone stole my newest rod/reel and Matt’s brand new rod/reel that he brought from the states from outside my trailer. We knew of 2 locals who passed through the property that night and promptly went to one of them and he was ruled out immediately. The other one, we have no idea where he lives. So it’s time to set up a sting and salt the area and wait in ambush with hard sticks and machetes. Conan and I were told by 2 separate cops that it’s legal to stab a thief in the butt or leg to “slow him down and make it easier to catch and identify (because of the wound) the thief. We hope to catch someone red handed and make an example of him by giving him a permanent limp that will remind other potential thieves that we’re tired of it and ain’t gonna take it anymore! News updates as they happen! Anyway, Matt and I visited Uncle Harry’s and replaced out missing gear. As I walked in I ask Harry if it was alright that I called in a Dangriga cop. He asked why and I told him about out latest misfortune. I said, “Who knew we had new fishing tackle and who would benefit most from it going missing?” We had a good chuckle over that and picked out our stuff.

We’ve had a heck of a time getting the boat out of the water and up on the beach. It took 6 of us and a big come-a-long strap the 1st time and 5 guys and a come-a-long the 2nd , and we didn’t succeed that time. We have two 6” PVC rollers and a couple of boards too nit we just can’t figure our how to get it up the double slope of the shore line in front of Kismet. We bought a heavy duty hand winch, an 8X8 railroad tie, and a bag of cement trying to make it easier but each idea fails. We’ve sunk the darn thing at least 5 times now. The post is now cemented into the sand under the palapa and today (Monday 5/10) and mounted the winch on Wednesday. When we attempted to pull the boat out we found that, even with the post cemented 2 feet into the sand, it wasn’t stable enough to pull the boat. The boat did move a few feet until the post started pulling forward, at which time we stopped. So we bailed as much water out of it as we could, all the while waves were refilling it, and finally were able to get it floated. So we pulled it out about 100 feet into waist deep water, set the anchor, and hooked up the battery to get the bilge pump working. No luck! There was just too much sand in the pump hole. Someone, and I won’t mention any names to protect all of us because we’ve all had some pretty strange ideas, determined that we should face the bow (front of the boat) toward the beach. VERY WRONG MOVE!!! Several large waves poured over the transom (the wall at the back of the boat that the engine is connected to) and down she went. So we swam off heavy hearted and took a much needed break, We’d been at this more or less from 2am on, trying to use high and low tide to solve some of our problems. We figured that high tide would help us get the boat up the slope. We thought that waiting until low tide we could get most of the water out and it would be easier to pull it up. Twice we’ve used Robert’s (another long term resident) 2 wheel drive pickup truck to winch it up the darn slope. We’ve now beached it half way up the slope but it isn’t high enough and high tide refills the boat with water and floating seaweed. We are all pretty sore from all the work we’ve done to save the boat. Matt is a weight-lifter kind of guy and even he’s suffering. I guess it’s because we aren’t used to working in moving water, being pounded by big waves, pushing/pulling the boat with shifting sand around our feet, and bailing like madmen for extended periods of time. It uses different muscles that we don’t normally use in those ways. So, nothing has worked and we’re all very frustrated but we have to keep trying because we want to save the boat. Today is another day and we’ll start all over again. And another thing…we’re getting rashes in delicate places from spending so much time in the water. I guess it’s time to pray to the patron saints of lost causes, boaters, the sea gods and goddesses, and anyone else we can think of to save us poor miserable boat people. We just can’t win…

And, so, life goes on for the Fatboy in Belize… And, as always, stay well, keep happy, and practice peace. I am!!!

A special update because we have a boat!!!

Conan finally bought the “Lil Nauti Lady”, a 19-1/2 deep “V” hulled boat with a 6-1/2 beam, on Tuesday May 3rd. He was having ATM trouble with his bank in the U.S. so I temporarily loaned him $13,500, knowing full well he’s good for it, so he could close the deal with the seller. He’s now completed 2 of his 3 missions in life. 1) An oxygen compressor for his dive tanks, 2) the boat, and as yet not even started, 3) purchasing a Mennonite home to be delivered to a small piece of property here on Kismet. Well 2 out of 3 ain’t bad! But his home purchase will be made soon enough. Anyway we towed the boat to Kismet Tuesday afternoon and couldn’t restart the engine. A Kismet friend named Earl showed up to help Tricia on Wednesday and, low and behold, he has the same type 85hp Yamaha engine. He and Conan did a little maintenance on it and had it running in no time. But it was too late to drag it to the marina to put it in the water. Thursday dawned and by noon we had it at the Sittee River marina. The boat launch was blocked by a 30 foot part barge. You know the kind, a double pontoon flat decked boat with an awning and a railing all around. This one had a bathroom too. Anywho, the owner showed up in a few minutes with his trailer, his wife, and a couple grandkids. He was pulling it out of the water to have it worked on and to sell. Anyone have US$30K laying around. Well getting it onto the trailer was another matter. The first attempt had the barge falling off the port (left for you land lubbers) side of the trailer. I called for him to stop pulling forward and he did and got out to see what happened. The trailer wasn’t in too good a shape anyway and the wood rails were hand wired on and splitting so the barge never was really on the trailer in the rear and the wire rope on the hand winch wire rope was broken. Patrick was there with his boat so we got him to pull the stern (I know, another nautical term, it means the back of the boat) around to try and line it up with the trailer. Easier said than done! It took 3 more tried to finally get it straight on the trailer and out of the water. Because the hand winch was broken so the barge was 4 feet back from where it should have been. This caused the trailer to drag on the ground. Not a good thing, especially with the condition of the road he was going to drive. Plus a new development. One of the trailer tires on the starboard side (right side) was flat. The marina had an air compressor so that was quickly fixed, along with the 2 tires on the port side (remember that’s the right side) that went flat a well while it was sitting on the ramp. We tried everything to get the bow (front) of the barge closer to the deck of the trailer because of the Well the barge had to move 4 feet further onto the trailer or no tow. Conan and I stood on the bow deck to add some weight while our friend Ron used a belt come-a-long to try and lower the bow onto the trailer. No luck. The only alternative was to try and get the barge 4 feet forward. So back in the water to try to float it up to the front. Again, no luck. Ron found the broken wire rope and tied it to the short piece still attached to the winch. The hook was also broken off so Ron attached it to the barge using a vice grip plier. So back into the water one more time to use the buoyancy to help move the boat forward while Ron cranked. I used a water bottle to keep the loose end of the wire rope from fouling the crank gear. That worked and the barge was finally on the trailer and ready to tow. The guy offered us BX$50 to buy cokes bit Conan asked him if he’d sell him 2 boat bumpers instead. The guy gave him the bumpers and still forces BX$10 on us for hydration. I forgot to tell you that it was 100 degrees and VERY sunny and the whole operation took about 2 hours so the drinks were a welcome relief. My shoulders got pretty burnt too because I was wearing a muscle tee. We had no problem getting Conan’s boat in the water and underway. Our first run was to Kismet to see if anyone wanted to come for a ride. I went ashore for a regular tee so my shoulders wouldn’t burn more. Tricia was waiting for a beer delivery so only had time for a short ride. We motored about, getting completely, and refreshingly, soaked because of the waves. Conan played with power settings and engine tilt to make sure everything was working properly and to get a feel for the boat. After dropping Tricia off we headed back to Sittee River to troll a bit (we didn’t catch anything) and tour the river northwest where we’d never been. Really pretty scenery and some really nice docked boats. Too soon we had to head back to the marina to drive Conan’s van and trailer and Ron’s pick up back to Kismet to meet Conan and beach the boat. That was another adventure! We weren’t sure what it was going to be like beaching the boat and them moving it up under the palapa cover. The shore line is made up of a 20-25 degree slope followed by about a 45 degree slope. Tricia did have two 6” pieces of PVC pipe to use as rollers but it still took 6 of us (5 pushing and Ron winching) to get it above the high tide mark but not under the palapa. Hopefully gravity will help us get it back into the water but we’ll have to come up with a better way to beach it. Our think tank (Conan and I) decided we need to put a heavy post into the sand under the palapa, buy a 12 volt winch and mount it on the post, and get 2 more PVC rollers and a couple of planks. That should do it we think. Time will tell… But at least we have a diving/fishing boat and the reef is only 30 minutes away any time we want to go. AND, no more having to put up with incompetent boat skippers. Now we’ll be our own incompetent, but at least more competent than they, skippers. We will at least learn how to be good boat drivers. Well, Conan does have some experience at it having done it for a few years. He’ll have to teach me the intricacies of maneuvering into and out of the docks without crashing into them. And while he’s diving I can do a little trolling near by. I guess though that I’ll have to get myself dive certified at some point. But my take on that is that it interferes with my fishing, and I don’t like things that interfere with my fishing! We’ll see though…

Good friends, and Kismet family members since last year, Matt and Angie will arrive on Friday, bringing their eldest daughter with them. It will be great to see them again and I can’t wait to fish with Matt again. He and I still hold the record for most fish caught in a single trip. I asked him to bring me some fishing tackle (wire leaders and swivel snaps mostly) and a bottle of Bailey’s Irish Cream and a bottle of Irish Whiskey. You can’t buy Irish Whiskey anywhere in Belize. I promised a shot or 2 to our friend Oliver, an Irish born boy, and he’s all excited. He and his partner Denise own Driftwood Bar and Pizza shack a couple properties south of Kismet. I’ll have to stop there Saturday night…

The local Cinco de Mayo celebration was held at Driftwood on 5/5 (when else would it be held you ask?) and a finer Mexican feast was never cooked up. I had the Barito Pollo with Denise’s fresh mango salsa. It was so good I had to have 2!!! So much for losing weight! I had met Denise in the market a few days before and she was telling me that she forgot the CdM was coming up but was now planning a celebration and, knowing I had over 600 movies, asked if I had Nacho Libre (Jack Black) or ¡Three Amigos! (Chevy Chase, Steve Martin, Martin Short). Nope but I’ll see if I can download them. Well I found and downloaded both but had no blank DVDs to put them on. So we ended up watching a non-Mexican themed movie. I told her I’d get them to her on DVDs whenever I got a couple. We had a great time anyway.

And that's today's story from the Fatboy in Belize! Keep happy and healthy and practice peace. I do!

The lagoon has closed

I’ve been fishing on the reef twice (4/12 & 4/14) since I posted last, and twice in one week, and I just can’t get enough of it! There’s just something about being out there in a boat seeing the different colors of the water and all that sun. I could stay out there forever. And I had a pretty good day of fishing on the 14th too! Trolling I lost a nice cuda and standing in Bread&Butter Caye I lost 2 more. Bottom fishing in 100 feet of water netted me an 8 pound black grouper (that fed 5 of us and gave me 3 more dinners worth), 5 grunts (I threw 1 back), a permit, and a spotted hind grunt. I was the only one that fished today. On the 12th I caught a cuda that fed 6 while my fishing buddy of the day, Kelly, caught a number of spotted hind groupers and yellowtail snappers. On both trips our boat captain Patrick showed his complete lack of customer focus, as he has several times in the past, and today (4/14) I vowed to never fish with him again and that’s a promise I will keep. (Conan lets buy that boat so we don’t have to rely on the poorly trained fishing guides in Hopkins ever again!) On the 13th Kelly and I caught a catfish each and her traveling companion, Karl, caught a dogtooth snapper in the lagoon. Conan was the recipient of our catch and ate them later in the week.

Jeff and his son Zak, from the San Francisco area, are on a couple month driving tour of Central America and came to stay with us for about a week and a half. They left on Tuesday 4/26. Jeff is a photographer and wants to photograph the Mayan ruins at Carocol on a moonless night. He’s been quoted different price rates for the opportunity and so far has been unable to come to an agreement with the Ministry of Archeology. The rates range anywhere from free to US$800 for the night, depending on who you talk to, and when. They seem to be doing a rather splendid job of jerking him around. He began emailing for permission several months before he came and still no agreement. My take on it is that they will drag their heels until the very last minute hoping that he’ll cough up the US$800 because his trip will be about over. We’ll see how it ends. Click on "Jeff" to take a look at his website to see some of his work.

Zak has been going to the lagoon with me every morning and night but for the longest time he watched Arthur and I catch fish while he went home empty handed. His Dad even bought him a nice rod and spinning reel from Uncle Harry’s Hardware but to no avail…until the evening of Friday 4/22. That night he finally caught 2 small dogtooth snappers to bust his Belize fishing cherry and put an end to what I’m sure he thought was a jinx on him and his fishing rod. A couple days after Zac got his rod Conan, Arthur, and I went to Uncle Harry’s and we were like kids in a candy store Harry had gotten in a shipment of rods and reels and Conan and I were looking to replace the ones we’d had stolen and Arthur wanted to buy a rod to fish with (he’s been borrowing one of mine). So we tried this rod and that reel and that reel and this rod until we found a set that made us happy. I got a nice Shakespeare set up that I will use exclusively in the lagoon and save my Penn for trolling the reef.I also stocked up on weights as we’d lost quite a few of mine over the past week. The lagoon was hungry for fishing tackle so it ate well, while my tackle box got lighter. Harry, the good guy that he is, let is choose BZ$10 worth of lures for free too so we hemmed and hawed over what to pick. We were there a good hour and hated to leave. Before we did Harry’s wife brought down a bag of smoked barracuda that they’d just made using orange (tree) wood for smoke and a soy sauce marinade. Boy was that ever delicious! He said he’d smoke anything we brought in for ½ of whatever it is. I might just do that soon!

The guests booked a fishing/snorkeling trip on Saturday 4/23, and it started off on the wrong foot with Johnny Bosco (stupid sc*mb*g from our trip on 4/5). Tricia gave him BZ$100 to buy gas for the boat before he came to Kismet to pick everyone up so they didn’t have to stop on the way. Well he showed at 9am and at 9:30 I found out that he hadn’t bought the gas and needed to stop at the marina. So he and Tricia got into a shouting match about how he doesn’t listen and how his customer service sucks because now they wouldn’t reach the reef until around 11, 1-1/2 hours later than planned. I decided not to go after he and I had a few words. I didn’t like the high waves and didn’t want to go anway, and you know me and my fishing so you know the wind and surf had to be bad. Conan and his girlfriend Adela, Jeff and Zac, Arthur, and Tricia and Elvis were already going so I would have made 9 with Bosco, a totally overweight boat that was made a little safer by keeping my tonnage on shore. So off they went. On the way to getting gas the hose popped out of the gas can and Bosco, while NOT steering, made a major project out of trying to get the hose back into the can. They finally stopped off the beach 2 blocks from the marina and Bosco and Tricia walked up to the marina for gas. This will illustrate the lack of common sense and foresight of Bosco. He didn’t being a gas tank or even a jerry can for the gas. He expected the marina to have gallon bottles there to put the gas in! Granted you can go to Home Alone’s (another Hopkins person’s nickname) and buy gas by the gallon in old bleach bottles. But now you are talking about the marina…not a chance! So back to the boat to get the gallon bottles that he had 2 cycle engine oil (to mix with the gas for the boat engine) and used them. Not sure what he did with the extra oil though. Out to the reef they went and were soaked and sore from the pounding they took from the waves. Closer to the reef the wave action subsided and they did have a good time snorkeling. Bosco, Elvis, Arthur, and Tricia went bottom fishing while the others snorkeled and spear fished. Conan got a bagful and he let Zac try his hand at it and he got 1 or 2 as well. Tricia said Bosco and Elvis were pulling in small fish 2 at a time while Arthur caught 2 fish all day. You’d think the nitwit, wanting to please his customers, would have helped get Arthur on the fish or made sure that his pole was rigger correctly. Nope! He just fished on. Another reason I won’t fish with the guy ever again. He and another boat driver I fished with we more interested in how much fish they we catching than in making sure the paying customers were happy. And the other boat driver argues with me about sharing HIS bait with me. Now one of the things that comes with the fishing excursion is fishing tackle and bait. I always bring my own tackle because mine is in good shape, where theirs just barely has line on it. But I do expect to be provided live bait for trolling. He did finally give me some and was thoroughly pissed when I caught more than he did. Anyway…I’ll stop complaining now. It’s just a sore point with me that these guys are supposed to provide a service for tourist that will leave them with fond memories and fail miserably. CONAN BUY THAT BOAT YOU HAVE BEEN LOOKING AT!!!

We had another photographer guest here at Kismet. His name is Martin and he hails from London. From what I’ve seen he’s pretty darn good at it. Take a look at his website (click on Martin) and see what you think.

Fishing in the lagoon has come to a stand still for the moment. The mouth of the lagoon closed completely on May 1st because it’s the dry season and that’s what it’s supposed to do. The locals say it’s nature’s way of recharging it. We’ll see. Conan and I took a walk up to fish on the 2nd and caught absolutely nothing. Nary a bite even except for the crabs. Peter came to try throwing net and came up empty handed as well. Over the next few days Conan and I will canoe around and try some of the deeper spots to see if we can find anything to bring home. We’ll also take the canoe up into the big lagoon (a 2 mile paddle to get to it) to see if the stories of big tarpon and snook are true. Keep your fingers crossed!

The nation got some good news yesterday for a change. Osama Bin Laden is dead thanks to Seal Team 6. Maybe that will give a bit of closure to those who lost family and friends on 9/11 and allow the country to begin healing. But there’s still a long way to go in the fight against terrorism. There’s plenty more where he came from…

And, so, life goes on for the Fatboy in Belize… And, as always, stay well, keep happy, and practice peace. I am!!!

Fishing, guests, chickens, and life in general.

I’ve had an odd question from several of you so I figure I better answer. The question is what do I wear every day? Well I’ve made it easy on myself. I wear a bathing suit and muscle tee and nothing on my feet. At night I wear a pair of cotton athletic shorts. On days when I go into Dangriga or Belmopan I take may take a pair of flip flops but wear them less than ½ the trips. I’ve been to the U.S. Embassy in bathing suit and barefoot twice and no one has said a word. It’s too hot to wear much more than I do and I never know when I’ll end up in the water so I’m always prepared. My pockets are always empty too because of that and I have to remember to take money with me when I leave the property. I’ve been caught short in the grocery stores more than once with no cash because I forgot to load my pockets. Most times I don’t even have ID on me. You don’t have to carry your passport here so mine is always locked away with my wallet. I did wear a pair of shorts and a Hawaiian shirt (I even wore underwear!) for Luke & Jen’s beach wedding. Other than that my normal clothes are put away until I leave for the states because I DON”T NEED THEM!!! I like to live as simply as possible because I’m retired and I want to do as little work, and laundry, as possible. Anyway, its “no shirt, no shoes, no problem” most everywhere in Belize.

We had 2 more guests this week that we didn’t want to leave. Mark is from Douglasville GA who is a retired merchant seaman formerly of the Military Sealift Command and a former monk trainee (he never took his final vows. His friend James lives in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan and they’ve known each other for 35 years. Mark has joined the ranks of the Hopkins Fishing Club on Facebook and is a fly fisherman. He ventured out to the lagoon with me at 4:30am one morning to try his hand and caught a needlefish, actually foul hooked it in the stomach. But we recorded it as a catch none the less. I foul hooked a tiny snapper too just to make him feel better. On our reef trip he caught 2 more fish…by the mouth. Mark is looking to make his retirement home here in Belize and I hope it’s here in Hopkins. We can never have too many fishing buddies!!! Plus he’s a trained chef and we’ve been putting his skills to the test and he’s passed admirably. Coconut curried barracuda, stuffed peppers (my request) and several other entrees and veggie dishes have delighted out palettes! We’re going to steal his passport so he can’t leave! They did stay 9 days and I think thoroughly enjoyed it. But we were talking about all the people that had passed though Kismet that we didn’t want to leave but decided that, had they not left, we wouldn’t have met the next bunch we wanted to stay because Kismet would have been full up. So we decided its good they leave but that they come back again very soon, when there is a room available for them again.

Frank left us on Wednesday 4/5 to head home for Norway so we had to get in one more reef fishing adventure before he left. Our crew consisted of Frank, Mark, James, Conan, Tricia, Elvis, and me. Patrick, our regular guide, wasn’t available so Tricia hired Johnny Bosco (his nickname is “Johnny Bosco scumbag who can fish”). Tricia assured us he caught fish when no one else could catch them so we hired him. Well we added another adjective to his nickname today and (please I don’t mean to offend anyone) “STUPID”. I thought we’d been with the worst boat captains in the past but Johnny was a new low. We had dropped Conan (to spearfish), Mark (to fly fish), and James (to snorkel) at Bread&Butter Caye and headed off to find bait and then troll. Well we never found any bait (strike 1 for our new guide) and as we wrapped up our search Johnny gunned the engine and turned left (strike 2 and 3 because he did it 2ce that day). I was standing on one of the seats casting a lure at the time. The abrupt start and turn threw me over the seat, crashing in to Tricia who was sitting in the next seat up and my momentum crushed her against the side of the boat and pounded her right side ribs against the boat railing. WELLL I let him have it! He apologized but he certainly didn’t understand what could have happened had I not been able to soften the blow of my 225lbs crashing into Tricia. Anyway… Frank and I trolled with some of my new lures. I caught 3 small barracuda in different spots, all of them while we were looking for bait. We did get several hits while trolling but landed none. We bottom fished in about 100 feet of water for a couple hours and filed our cooler with Grunts, Jimmy Hine grouper, Rockfish (also a grouper) and a few other types. We had a lot of fun fishing though and the others enjoyed their adventures. Mark caught a couple of small snappers that sounded like keepers but he threw them back. At least he caught something though. When we got back to Kismet we were sitting in the kitchen with cold drinks and Mark told me that I taught him something. That turned out to be that he needed to buy spinning gear like mine because of the windy conditions, which made fly fishing hard to do. I told him he needed both because it’s been unusually windy the past few days and he’ll really enjoy his fly fishing when they calm down. We did manage to go back out on Tuesday 4/12 with Patrick though. Our group consisted of Karl (Sweden) and his red-headed traveling companion Kelly (Australia), Conan, and me. Tricia was a bit under the weather so she stayed home. I got a small cuda trolling while the others snorkeled and dove off Bread& Butter. Conan was able to rent 2 tanks but had immediate O-ring problems so spent most of his time snorkeling. He speared a few small fish of various kinds. After a few hours of trolling, and losing bait to small fish, we picked everyone else up for some bottom fishing. Kelly is the only one who caught fish, a small grouper and a small snapper. We did catch enough for dinner though. Karl, Kelly and I hit the lagoon on Wednesday night (4/13) and we each caught a fish, Karl’s first in Belize. He caught a dogtooth snapper and Kelly and I each caught a catfish. It’s a free dinner for Conan. We have another reef trip scheduled for Thursday 4/14 with 2 new guests from San Francisco, a father and son team.

I mentioned that Frank left on 4/5. More on that now. Tricia decided she was going to take a few days holiday and travel with him. Since Frank was flying out of Cancun for Oslo they decided to spend a few days in Playa Del Carmen. Tricia was in need of more REAL tequila, at a reasonable price, as well as a few other things and it’s a great place to rest and shop. It was a 14 hour bus ride from Hopkins to Playa (something I’ll find out 1st hand when I head back to Orlando in late May) but they made it safely and immediately headed for the tequila store. From her mouth to our ear it was a rather drunken day or 2 and not much shopping was actually accomplished. They are well though, had some beach time, and generally rested before they parted ways. Frank nearly missed his flight because he’d forgotten about the 1 hour time difference between Belize and Mexico. He hit the ticket counter 40 minutes prior to his flight and the flight was already closed out. An agent took pity on him and rushed him through security and he made his flight. Tricia did come home with a new glass monkey (she collects monkeys) that made the 2 day return intact. It’s sitting in a place of honor in the kitchen.

Conan made a down payment on a scuba tank compressor and 4 tanks that he hope will be ready for pick up in the next week or so. The owner is going to have it looked at and run because it’s been a long time since it was used. Hopefully everything will be fine. Now it’s time for him to settle on a boat. He has one in mind that he’s trying to contact the owner to haggle a price. We’ve looked at it twice and talked to the son and now it’s time to get busy. He’s hoping to have it all before Matt and Angie (Kismet friends from last year) get her in May 7th. If he’s successful we’ll use Conan’s boat. Keep your fingers crossed!

Tricia’s 9 chickens are all alive and doing well. They are getting big and even climbing the stairs to the porch and flying off. Bad thing is that they leave chicken poop all over the place and it’s like trying to get chewing gum off the bottoms of your feet if you aren’t careful where you step.

And, so, life goes on for the Fatboy in Belize… And, as always, stay well, keep happy, and practice peace. I am!!!

Oh no not again!

We celebrated St, Patrick’s Day on the 17th and Tricia’s birthday in the 18th and a great time was had by all! For St. Paddy’s Day we went to the Driftwood Bar and Pizza Shack. Oliver, the owner, is ½ Irish ½ English and his partner Denise was promising lamb stew with Guinness sauce, poached salmon, and green beer. We’ll they were out of salmon by the time we got there but the lamb stew (which is what I was going for anyway) was great. Denise gave me a free 2nd serving after I complimented her on it. Actually she said the freebee what because I was so nice because I had picked up a new set of guitar strings in Dangriga for Ollie that day. That was a pretty funny story too. When I was walking into Driftwood that afternoon Ollie came in the side door and was upset that he had just broken a 2nd string while practicing. I handed him the package with the new strings and asked if they were the right ones. Well…the look on his face and the way his eyes widened to saucer size you would think that I’d just fallen from heaven with what he needed most! I mean right when he was lamenting that he was down to 3 strings on his guitar, and was schedule to be that night’s entertainment, here was his savior! I could see in his face the question, “How did you know???” Denise had forgotten to tell him that she had asked me to pick up a new set on our morning trip. It was priceless!!! Ollie surprised us with his performance. None of us knew that he had such a nice voice. Of course he’s Irish and had a drink or 2 in him and that’s when Irishmen sing and play the best. The next night was Tricia’s celebration. Conan and I had split the cost of one if Caitlin’s delicious carrot/cream cheese icing cakes which we knew Tricia loves so much. We also gave her a bottle of wine. Normally she bales a cake for a guest’s birthday and we didn’t want her baking her own. Caitlin is the local baker and is very good. We’d gotten the same cake for her last birthday too.

Conan and I were victims again on Saturday 3/19. Actually it’s his 1st time, but my 4th, and we were REALLY upset by this one! Now we’re losing fishing equipment!!! It was all stolen out of Conan’s van. The thief got both of our new fishing rods and reels (one of the reels that Zeppi bought for me in the states) and Conan’s Hawaiian spear, a 2 ton car jack with assorted tools that he’d thrown into the case, a new fillet knife still in the package, a pack of cigarette, and a 5 pack of cigars (with only 4 in it as I’d smoked 1 of them) that Bruce has gifted me before he left. We called Choco, the Hopkins cop, to report it and have him come to take a formal report but he said he was too busy training the police explorers and would come that afternoon. Not good enough for us because we had 12 backpackers who were leaving that same morning, one of which had found the thief in his tent and several of them saw the guy in Conan’s van but thought he was sleeping in there. Anyway…late that afternoon Tricia called Chocó again and really gave him and earful about how incompetent he was and how he had promised to come and still hadn’t. A couple hours later he showed up with 2 Dangriga cops, 1 carrying an AR15 rifle (it’s a non-military version of the M16). By this time we’d found out that the thief was Elvis’s cousin Jason Pasqual, who lived in Dangriga. So we told them the story and told them who the thief was and I asked if we should report it in Dangriga since that’s where he lives. The reason that I asked that was because 2 weeks before, Tricia had seen the guy who robbed my trailer on New Year’s Eve, walking down a Dangriga street. When she reported seeing him to a cop in the Dangriga police station he said they couldn’t do anything about it because it was reported in Hopkins. I didn’t want to have that problem with this guy so I asked. We were told yes, to report it in Dangriga. We also put the word on the street that there is a reward for recovery (but didn’t specify an amount). We’ll also be biking around to look for him. If we found him we’re going to hobble him. Chocó had told us a few weeks before that it is legal for us to do that to a thief for 1) ease in identifying him (because now he’s limping) and 2) to keep him from escaping. So now we were both carrying knives and rope with us to tie him up until the cop arrives on his bicycle. If we’d seen him before making the official report we’d make him take us to the people he sold our stuff to, lying that we would set him free if he did. Once we get our stuff we’ll exact our revenge and let him know to tell his friends that what he suffered will be what anyone else coming to Kismet to steal will suffer as well. And it won’t be pretty! He will limp for the rest of his life so he that he remembers us and as a reminder to others that Kismet is off limits to thieves. In a drive around the village we talked to a number of locals to spread the news of what was stolen and to announce a reward for the return of everything. The last guy we talked to says the guy tried to sell him Conan’s car jack last night and described the additional tools that were inside the case. He also saw 1 rod/reel and the spear. He said the guy wanted BZ$10 for the jack (that cost Conan US$50) but the guy we talked to didn’t buy it. He says the guy lives in Dangriga and vows to get the stuff back. And he doesn’t want the reward. That will probably change though. We’ll see… UPDATE: Tuesday 3/22 we went into the Dangriga police station to make our report. As soon as we told them the purp’s name we knew that they knew him. In preparation for the visit Tricia wrote up and printed the details on her computer. I’m not sure if you remember me telling you that Belize is a very UNcomputerize country. Entry/exit and monthly visa stamp info is kept in large ledgers, not on computer. Police stations are even lower in the list for modernization. We’ve been in to report earlier thefts and the cops couldn’t take our report because, now get this, they didn’t have paper to write it on! So we went prepared for that by printing out the report so they would have a copy. Well, this time they had a pad so the desk officer proceeded to write, in long hand, the report directly from the printed page. That took an hour. Meanwhile we were able to take 2 other officers in Conan’s van for a drive by of the purp’s house so that they knew where he lived for whenever they decided to bring him in. If he was there as we passed by they were ready to pick him up, again using Conan’s van as transport. We still haven’t heard if he’s been questioned yet…

Frank returned to Kismet from his side trip to Caye Caulker the other day and brought 5 new guests with him. One was George, from Hamburg Germany, who he'd met on Caulker. He also had 2 very funny, and very friendly Polish women, Zofia and Kasha (Kasha actually lives in Brooklyn NY), plus 2 others whose names I’ve forgotten. George finally left us today (Monday 3/28) to head down to Panama to meet up with a friend and then fly back to Germany. He’s another of those guests we hate to see go and he actually rescheduled his leaving us twice to fish the reef and just because he didn’t want to leave us. Frank will be with us for about 3 weeks before he has to go home and back to his job. We keep trying to talk him into "pulling a Conan" (cancelling his flight and staying forever!) but, as much as he'd like to, can't.

We did a reef fishing/snorkeling trip in Saturday 3/26 and had a great time. We actually picked the best of 3 days to go out too. The sea was nice and smooth. Frank, George, Tricia, Conan and I made up the party. While we were still in the marina George tried unsuccessfully to board the boat as it was drifting away from the dock. He fell into the water and lost a US$400 pair of sun glasses. He and Conan tried to find them but couldn’t. We headed directly to Bread&Butter and Conan and George stayed to snorkel while Frank and I went to troll. Fishing was pretty slow. We did lose a lot of bait, well actually had ½ the bait taken by short strikes until we went back to Bread&Butter. Then my old friend the 6ft tarpon struck my line again. He made a couple of really spectacular twisting jumps before he straightened out my hook and swam away. And, like the 1st time I hooked him, Tricia didn’t have the camera ready so there’s no photographic evidence. Frank and I did manage to boat 2 Crevalle jacks and Patrick, the captain boated a nice mutton snapper which he gave to us. We pulled into the marina and Conan tried again to find George’s glasses. He dove for about 15 or 20 minutes without finding them Tricia enlisted the help of a couple of local men sitting on the dock. One of them found George’s glasses in about 10 minutes. We were really shocked because we thought that the tide and boat prop wash would have pushed them either downriver or into deeper water. They were about 10 feet further into the river but right near where they were lost. Hopefully our next trip out to the reef will be in Conan’s new boat.

Playing cards took over Kismet the past few nights. While I missed the 1st night I joined in the next couple. The favorite game was called “shithead” and was introduced to us from Germany by George. The last one with cards in their hand was the shithead. It’s a very fun game. Even Elvis followed along and did well. Now that George is gone things will probably go back to normal though. I had suggested a movie night, with Geo selecting the movie, but he preferred cards so that’s what we did.

I’ve booked a trip to Orlando from May 25th through June 15th to see my daughter Carrie finally make her confirmation. She’s chosen the name Josephine for her confirmation name, as her name when she becomes a nun will be Sister Mary Josephine.

And so, life goes on for the Fatboy in Belize… And, as always, stay well, keep happy, and practice peace. I am!!!

More chickens and great guests.

Tricia and Kismet Inn now have a new website compliments of our friend Kenny (he stayed here a few weeks ago). It’s:
http://kismetinn.cipherblue.com. He is a web designer, among other things, and promised her that he would build a site and host it on his server and he has done her proud. Please take a look. And, thanks so much Kenny!!!

Tricia had ordered 6 Polish hens from Father Dominic (the pastor of Holy Redeemer R.C. in Dangriga) a while ago and yesterday, Friday 3/4, 4 of them were delivered to Kismet. Father Dominic raises and sells all kinds of fowl including turkeys, ducks, geese, and chickens to supplement the church’s income. It’s pretty meager here so the sale of the birds helps support the church. Anyway, Tricia and Ron played with them for a while then she tucked them away in the chicken coop in a cardboard box, turned on its side, or so she thought. We were sure that her dogs couldn’t get to them because the fence is too high. She also plugged a few hole that we thought they could escape through, so thought they would be safe for the night. When I came back from fishing I went out to check on them, thinking I would find them wandering around in the small coop yard. It was strangely quiet so I went into the yard and looked inside the coop. One dead hen outside the box, one dead inside the box, and 2 missing. I woke Tricia up and told her. We looked for the other 2, hoping to find them wandering in the trees to the right of the coop yard but we didn’t find anything. We found the 3rd one up on the deck next to her door. No sign of the 4th one. We think it was a Coatimundi that did the damage, Later that morning Ron looked out the kitchen window and saw that Xanadu had dug a hole near the bushes separating the underneath courtyard from the parking lot and had placed the chicken in the hole and was about to bury it. He ran out and rescued a terror stricken hen, placing it back in the box and brought it up to the kitchen. It was shaking like a leaf and we could only imagine that it was from being carried off by and nearly killed. After a few hours it was almost as good as new, wandering around it’s box. Tricia said we needed a good name for it so I suggested Frances, after Francis of Assisi the patron saint of animals. She liked it so that’s the hen’s name now. Tricia was still waiting for 2 more (her original order was for 6) and she is ordered a couple more to replace the ones killed. She also moved them to a more secure area, namely the dog house, and surrounded it with a tarp, thinking that it would keep any animal out. Wrong!!! The next day (Mon 3/7) all but one of the new chickens are dead and Frances is missing and presumed dead as well. So today, Tues 3/8, Conan and I took a ride into Dangriga and bought 4 more. Tricia has been locking them in her apartment at nigh. So far, so good!

Conan finally bought his own fishing rod and spinning reel on Tuesday 3/8. Not that I minded his using my stuff but he finally admitted that he is hooked on fishing. We spent about an hour in Uncle Harry’s Hardware in Dangriga talking fishing with Harry and looking at components. Conan finally settled on a twin of my boat/lagoon rod and a medium weight spinning reel. It took 4 trips to the lagoon before he finally caught a fish on it, actually a couple of catfish, and they were part of his dinner that night. He says he wants to catch a “Rich size fish” now, you know, the ones that pop up in my Facebook page or on this blog from time to time. That too will come with time and I can’t wait for it to happen. I know I’ll be there because he hasn’t been bitten as hard as me by the fishing bug and taken a trip to the lagoon on his own. We’ve been itching for a reef trip too because it’s been a couple of weeks now and his having the new rod will hasten our planning of a trip. By the way he’s Ernest Robley on Facebook if you want to friend him.

We had a famous author in our midst at Kismet and she arrived on Friday March 11the and left on Sunday. Dr. Barbara Brodman is the author of “Looking for Mister Guevara" in which she follows the path of Che Guevara through South America prior to the Cuban Revolution in 1951. She is also a professor of Latin American & Caribbean Studies at Nova Southeastern University in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. She teaches an online course from her Belize home in Spanish Lookout too. Conan has a fondness for the humanitarian side of Che (he was a medical student and travels extensively on South and Central America) and was beside himself when he found out who she was. She’s been a long time friend of Tricia and I’ve seen her a time or two at Kismet but never had the pleasure of talking to her until now. She’s a very pleasant and fun loving lady.

I don’t know what it is about burnt foods but I’m a HUGE fan. Not meats & veggies (although some veggies) but breads and cookies. And it’s been that way all my life. Maybe it’s because I came from a family of 7 kids and most of them didn’t like the burnt ones so that left more for me. Maybe it’s just because I loved the taste. But no matter, I always encouraged, you might say pleaded, with both of my wives to leave a few in a few extra minutes. Now you know cookie bakers, they want every cookie picture perfect so it was hard for them to do it. But they would do it for me anyway and I loved them for it. My favorites are chocolate chip and oatmeal but burn away any other type and I gobble them up. Tricia baked a loaf of fruit bread in the morning and some kind of dinner bread at night. Her oven’s temperature is hard to regulate so there are times when I’m able to slice off the entire bottom of the loaf and sit in charcoal heaven, enjoying every last crumb. She made oatmeal cookies a couple weeks ago and burnt a few just for me. She’s such a good friend! One of the simple pleasures in my life in paradise!

We spent the day out at the reef and Bread&Butter Caye today (Monday 3/14) snorkeling and fishing and had a wonderful time. Crystal and Henry from Calgary, Valerie from Montreal, Conan, Tricia and I made up the list. I was the only full time fisherman, as usual, and everyone else mostly snorkeled. Conan did his thing with his Hawaiian spear and brought in a scrawled filefish, an Atlantic spadefish, a Spanish grunt, and a blue stripped grunt. He trolled for a few minutes on our way back to the marina but didn’t catch anything. I caught 3 barracuda. A 13lb one that I fought for about 10 minutes and a 7 and a 2-3/4 cuda. Needless to say dinner was delicious! After feeding 8 people I still have 6 pounds left for future dinners.

We’ve had a really fun group of people staying here the past few days and, again, it’s hard to see them go. Hopefully, and really more probably, the next guests will be ones we hate to see leave. That’s one of the things I love about living here. I get to meet so many wonderful people. Goodbye to Chrystal and Henry and to Valerie, all of whom were from Canada.

And that’s the way it goes, March 14, 2011; for the Fatboy in Belize! As always, stay well, keep happy, and practice peace. I am!!!